 The Good Times just keep on coming. 
Another Saturday, another installment from the Good Time Weekly Calendar of 1963. The model above resisted all attempts at identification, and the photographer is listed as anonymous, but fret not—the daily quotations are faithfully transcribed below. This time, women are the targets of the assorted quipsters. We know this type of humor was considered good fun back then, but really, isn't it a little twisted to bash women while looking at their naked bodies for sexual gratification? Just asking. Still no clue on the He-who Who-he reference, by the way. Anyone with info please feel free to drop us a line. March 24: “In most of our Hollywood beauty shops the gossip alone would curl your hair.”—Pat Buttram March 25: “One picture is worth 10,000 words—but for some reason most women prefer to use 10,000 words.”—George Gobel March 26: No one can tell her anything—she’s got sound proof ears. March 27: “In many conversations a man can’t break in because a woman won’t break off.”’—Telly Savalas March 28: You never know how much the voice can change till a woman stops yelling and answers the phone. March 29: “A woman doesn’t tell the truth all the time—there just isn’t that much truth.”—He-who Who-he March 30: “The best way to tie a woman down is with a telephone cord.”—Paul Gibson.
 Are you still planning to catch and release? Happy St. Patrick’s Day. In celebration here’s our second posting from the Good Time Weekly Calendar of 1963, featuring a net-draped model we can’t identify shot by a photographer named Shulman who we also can’t identify. So there. Calendar text is transcribed below. Boy they sure knew how to get a laugh out of people back then. Or not. March 17: “Ladies’ evening dresses are getting more daring. The front is now daring the back.”—Leslie Uggams March 18: “Running into debt isn’t so bad; it’s running into your creditors that’s embarrassing.”—O.G. Zimmerman March 19: “Would you call a girls’ baseball team ‘swatter girls’?”—Sam Cowling March 20: Sweater girls are divided into two classes; those who knit them and those who fit them,”—Paul Fogarty March 21: “Most men lack imagination and that’s why dress designers leave so little to it.”—Peggie Castle March 22: Two things make women slow… first she must make up her mind and then her face.”—Keith Preston March 23: Short dresses do not affect women’s appearance much; they just make the men look longer.”—Sam Cowling So, who were all these people? We found nothing on O.G. Zimmerman, Paul Fogarty, and Keith Preston. We already knew Leslie Uggams and Peggie Castle—singer and actress respectively—and they have Wikipedia entries if you’re curious. So that leaves Sam Cowling. It’s Cowling who gets the lion’s share of quotes in the Good Time Calendar, so we expected him to have been quite famous and he was. He was a member of a vocal group called The Romeos, but later became a regular cast member of a radio variety program called The Breakfast Club. The hourlong program, hosted by Don McNeill, ran from 1933 until 1968, and Cowling (below right) came aboard in ’37, having by then transformed himself from a singer into an improvisational comedian. Working off the cuff was a good fit for his new gig, since apparently The Breakfast Club was mostly unscripted. The extemporaneous format was a big success, and helped set a mold for morning radio shows that holds even today. It also made the leap to television as a special event in 1948. Wanna hear The Breakfast Club? Go to the bottom of this page. For video check here. We’re off to have a glass or several of green beer.
 The resurrection of Lazzaro. So, last week we mentioned that we had found the best calendar of all time at the Denver Book Fair. Above is the first image we’re posting from it, a tinted shot of Sophia Loren’s famous nude scene in 1951’s Era lui... sì! sì!, in which she appeared as Sophia Lazzaro. By 1953 she had begun acting as Loren, leaving the Lazzaro screen name behind forever. Her nude scene was never a secret, exactly, but until the internet came along stills from Era lui appeared only in porn and scandal magazines—and, apparently, obscure calendars. So thank you world wide web for making formerly impossible-to-find nudity readily available via a mouseclick or two.
This calendar—The Goodtime Weekly Calendar of 1963, printed in the U.S. by Good Time Publishing—has a nude or pin-up image for every week of the year, and in addition, a joke, quote, or pithy saying for every day of each week. The sayings are illegibly small on our posted image, so we’ve transcribed them below. But don’t thank us until you read them. While a couple are mildly amusing, most aren’t, and one is simply incomprehensible (March 14). We hope they improve as the year continues, but if they don’t, think of them anthropologically—i.e., try to value them as artifacts of an older culture that we're going to study for whatever insights we can glean. And if that doesn’t interest you, well, you can just look at the pretty photos. We’ll post one calendar page per week, along with its text, until we run through all fifty-two.
March 10: “Sophia Loren has been awarded an Oscar for Two Women. By gosh, she certainly is.”—Bob Hope.
March 11: Figures don’t lie; that’s why an honest man believes in good sizes.
March 12: “A gossip always gives you the benefit of the dirty.”—Sam Cowling.
March 13: Anybody who still says the sky’s the limit is way behind the times.
March 14: “Tips from outer space: Tired of chimps and dogs and men—try us with a woman.”—He-who Who-he
March 15: “Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.—Henry Cooke.
March 16: “Beauty contests didn’t start in Atlantic City or any other city; they began when the second woman arrived on Earth.”—Mitch Miller.
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The headlines that mattered yesteryear.
1960—Adolf Eichmann Is Captured
In Buenos Aires, Argentina, four Israeli Mossad agents abduct fugitive Nazi Adolf Eichmann, who had been living under the assumed name and working for Mercedes-Benz. Eichman is taken to Israel to face trial on 15 criminal charges, including crimes against humanity and war crimes. He is found guilty and executed by hanging in 1962, and is the only person to have been executed in Israel on conviction by a civilian court. 2010—Last Ziegfeld Follies Girl Dies
Doris Eaton Travis, who was the last surviving Ziegfeld Follies chorus girl, dies at age 106. The Ziegfeld Follies were a series of elaborate theatrical productions on Broadway in New York City from 1907 through 1931. Inspired by the Folies Bergères of Paris, they enjoyed a successful run on Broadway, became a radio program in 1932 and 1936, and were adapted into a musical motion picture in 1946 starring Fred Astaire, Gene Kelly, Lucille Ball, and Lena Horne. 1924—Hoover Becomes FBI Director
In the U.S., J. Edgar Hoover is appointed director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, a position he retains until his death in 1972. Hoover is credited with building the FBI into a large and efficient crime-fighting agency, and with instituting a number of modern innovations to police technology, such as a centralized fingerprint file and forensic laboratories. But he also used the agency to grind a number of personal axes and far exceeded its legal mandate to amass secret files on political and civil rights leaders. Because of his abuses, FBI directors are now limited to 10-year terms. 1977—Joan Crawford Dies
American actress Joan Crawford, who began her show business career as a dancer in traveling theatrical companies, but soon became one of Hollywood's most prominent movie stars and one of the highest paid women in the United States, dies of a heart attack at her New York City apartment while ill with pancreatic cancer. 1949—Rainier Becomes Prince of Monaco
In Monaco, upon upon the death of Prince Louis II, twenty-six year old Rainier Louis Henri Maxence Bertrand Grimaldi, aka Rainier III, is crowned Prince of Monaco. Rainier later becomes an international household name by marrying American cinema sweetheart Grace Kelly in 1956. 1950—Dianetics is Published
After having told a gathering of science fiction writers two years earlier that the best way to become a millionaire was to start a new religion, American author L. Ron Hubbard publishes Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health. The book is today one of the canonical texts of Scientology, referred to as "Book One", and its publication date serves as the first day of the Scientology calendar, making today the beginning of year 52 AD (After Dianetics).
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