Mondo Bizarro Jul 6 2010
DOUBLE DRIBBLE
Two heads are not always better than one.

One man’s monstrosity is another man’s miracle. That immutable truth was reaffirmed in Egypt a couple of days ago when the hideous beast you see above, with its two distinct but fused skulls, was birthed by a cow belonging to farmer Sobhy el-Ganzoury. El-ganzoury says the calf is proof that God can do anything. Perhaps, but we think it's more likely that a standard-issue genetic misfire created this P.T. Barnum-style midway freak that can’t lift its own head(s) or walk. Nevertheless, we consider it our duty to entertain all possibilities, and the signs here may be too powerful to ignore. Consider: we have the el-Ganzoury calf. And we have the Connecticut calf born in December. And before both animals appeared, this grill in California became infused with divine properties. How does one interpret the presence of two cows and an industrial size flattop grill? What is it we’re being told here? Hmm, well, best not to think too deeply about it. Some mysteries just aren’t meant to be solved. 

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History Rewind
The headlines that mattered yesteryear.
January 22
1946—CIA Forerunner Created
U.S. president Harry S. Truman establishes the Central Intelligence Group or CIG, an interim authority that lasts until the Central Intelligence Agency is established in September of 1947.
1957—George Metesky Is Arrested
The New York City "Mad Bomber," a man named George P. Metesky, is arrested in Waterbury, Connecticut and charged with planting more than 30 bombs. Metesky was angry about events surrounding a workplace injury suffered years earlier. Of the thirty-three known bombs he planted, twenty-two exploded, injuring fifteen people. He was apprehended based on an early use of offender profiling and because of clues given in letters he wrote to a newspaper. At trial he was found legally insane and committed to a state mental hospital.
January 21
1950—Alger Hiss Is Convicted of Perjury
American lawyer Alger Hiss is convicted of perjury in connection with an investigation by the House unAmerican Activities Committee (HUAC), at which he was questioned about being a Soviet spy. Hiss served forty-four months in prison. Hiss maintained his innocence and fought his perjury conviction until his death in 1996 at age 92.
1977—Carter Pardons War Fugitives
U.S. President Jimmy Carter pardons nearly all of the country's Vietnam War draft evaders, many of whom had emigrated to Canada. He had made the pardon pledge during his election campaign, and he fulfilled his promise the day after he took office.
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