Mondo Bizarro Jul 6 2010
DOUBLE DRIBBLE
Two heads are not always better than one.

One man’s monstrosity is another man’s miracle. That immutable truth was reaffirmed in Egypt a couple of days ago when the hideous beast you see above, with its two distinct but fused skulls, was birthed by a cow belonging to farmer Sobhy el-Ganzoury. El-ganzoury says the calf is proof that God can do anything. Perhaps, but we think it's more likely that a standard-issue genetic misfire created this P.T. Barnum-style midway freak that can’t lift its own head(s) or walk. Nevertheless, we consider it our duty to entertain all possibilities, and the signs here may be too powerful to ignore. Consider: we have the el-Ganzoury calf. And we have the Connecticut calf born in December. And before both animals appeared, this grill in California became infused with divine properties. How does one interpret the presence of two cows and an industrial size flattop grill? What is it we’re being told here? Hmm, well, best not to think too deeply about it. Some mysteries just aren’t meant to be solved. 

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History Rewind
The headlines that mattered yesteryear.
March 18
1906—First Airplane Flight in Europe
Romanian designer Traian Vuia flies twelve meters outside Paris in a self-propelled airplane, taking off without the aid of tractors or cables, and thus becomes the first person to fly a self-propelled, heavier-than-air aircraft. Because his craft was not a glider, and did not need to be pulled, catapulted or otherwise assisted, it is considered by some historians to be the first true airplane.
1965—Leonov Walks in Space
Soviet cosmonaut Aleksei Leonov leaves his spacecraft the Voskhod 2 for twelve minutes. At the end of that time Leonov's spacesuit had inflated in the vacuum of space to the point where he could not re-enter Voskhod's airlock. He opened a valve to allow some of the suit's pressure to bleed off, was barely able to get back inside the capsule, and in so doing became the first person to complete a spacewalk.
March 17
1966—Missing Nuke Found
Off the coast of Spain in the Mediterranean, the deep submergence vehicle Alvin locates a missing American hydrogen bomb. The 1.45-megaton nuke had been lost by the U.S. Air Force during a midair accident over Palomares, Spain. It was found resting in nearly three-thousand feet of water and was raised intact on 7 April.
March 16
1968—My Lai Massacre Occurs
In Vietnam, American troops kill between 350 and 500 unarmed citizens, all of whom are civilians and a majority of whom are women, children, babies and elderly people. Many victims are sexually abused, beaten, tortured, and some of the bodies are mutilated. The incident doesn't become public knowledge until 1969, but when it does, the American war effort is dealt one of its worst blows.
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