Above you see the front of an issue of the New York City based tabloid Inside News published today in 1967, with its usual banner “The Lowdown Coast to Coast.” Lowdown is right—within you get lethal sex, killer bears, women bartered and sold, and a sadist who carved his initials on a bellydancer’s torso. But fear not—there’s lighter fare as well. Burlesque dancer Rita Atlanta uses a column to criticize Italian actress Gia Sandri for performing a bad striptease in the film Signore & signori. Atlanta advises Sandri, “A woman has to know “when her hips should zig and when they should zag.” That sounds more like an evasive maneuver to us, and considering how bad Inside News is on the whole, it’s good advice. The paste-up alone is enough to scare you. Run fast and run far. Scans below.