Mondo Bizarro Jul 24 2017
INMATE 666
Satanist loses appeal in triple murder case.

We know you've probably been wondering how our old friend Caius Veiovis has been doing since landing in supermax for three 2011 murder-dismemberments. We finally have an update for you. His appeal for a new trial was denied last week by the Massachusetts Supreme Court. In seeking a do-over, Veiovis's lawyers claimed that the trial judge abused his discretion in admitting evidence and that this had the effect of prejudicing the jury. Which is interesting, because the jury probably assumed Veiovis vivisected nuns. When they learned he only cut a teenager's back open with a razor and kissed his girlfriend while licking the blood, it probably improved his standing in their eyes. The jury also learned that Veiovis possessed anatomical manuals detailing surgical and amputation procedures. In the end the appeals panel voted 3-2 against a new trial.

You're probably curious as to why the vote was so close. It's not because two of the panel were visited by an avatar of Satan who threatened an eternity of red hot branding irons in their eye sockets if they didn't vote for retrial, but because the case against Veiovis was circumstantial. There were no witnesses that testified to his involvement, no incriminating statements from Veiovis himself, and there was no forensic evidence linking him to the scenes. So unless Veiovis is simply so scary nobody will cross him (possible), and that same avatar of Satan windexed his DNA from the crime scenes (not likely), it indeed looks at least somewhat possible prejudice may have had a hand in his conviction. Which must have been a real shocker for him, because when he got those horns implanted and that 666 tattooed on his forehead he couldn't possibly have been expected to anticipate any negative effects. Back then, he probably thought it was a good look for Saturday nights at the goth club.

So Veiovis is back in supermax serving his full sentence of life, but with a narrow appeal decision the case could actually be taken up by the federal courts. Veoivis's lawyer believes the misconduct in the trial sets a precedent allowing anything creepy about a defendant to be admitted as evidence, even if it has nothing to do with the case. We'd argue that drinking blood from a sixteen-year-old's back lacerations and studying dismemberment are relevant to a murder-dismemberment case, but his lawyer does have a point. A guy like Veiovis is almost guaranteed to have incriminating items around his place. If it hadn't been medical books, it might have been a copy of American Psycho or a bunch of Electric Hellfire Club albums. A slippery slope indeed. Though Veiovis lost this round, at least he's learning not to make himself look worse than he already does. When he was convicted of the 2011 murders he screamed to the jury: “I'll see you all in hell! Remember that! Every fucking one of you! I'll see you all in hell!” This time he let the bailiffs lead him quietly away. 

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Mondo Bizarro Sep 15 2011
ME SO HORNY
Booking photo of man with facial adornments goes viral, defense attorney resorts to prayer.
We’ve always posted mugshots on Pulp Intl., but due to the nature of the site we prefer those of the celebrity variety. But Caius Veiovis, who you see above, qualifies by virtue of the fact that his arrest photo has gone fully viral, metastasizing throughout the internet in just two days on thousands of sites in dozens of countries. Veiovis was arrested in Massachusetts along with two accomplices for the murder of three men who were slated to testify at the criminal trial of a local Hell’s Angel. Veiovis has pleaded not guilty to the charges, and his lawyer must be on his knees in a church right now praying there are no eyewitnesses, because the cross examination would be a bitch:
 
Defense: “And how can you be so sure it was my client you saw running from the scene covered in blood and screaming exhortations to the Prince of Darkness?”
 
Witness: “Well, there’s the horns, and the 666 on his forehead, and, you know, those spiky—”
 
Defense: “So it’s safe to say you were focused on these adornments? So focused in fact, that you never really saw my client’s face, isn’t that correct?”
 
Witness: “Isn’t the forehead part of the face?”
 
Defense: “Is it? Then why isn’t it called the foreface, smart guy?”
 
Prosecution: “Objection! Badgering the witness.”
 
Judge: “I’ll allow it.”

Defense: “Ladies and gentlemen, my client’s adornments are no different than a hat and pair of sunglasses, accoutrements any of a thousand other men could easily wear, and probably do. In fact, I even have a couple of horns I wear sometimes. I got them when I passed the Bar Exam. Your Honor, move to dismiss.”     

 
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History Rewind
The headlines that mattered yesteryear.
November 18
1916—First Battle of the Somme Ends
In France, British Expeditionary Force commander Douglas Haig calls off a battle against entrenched German troops which had begun on July 1, 1916. Known as the Battle of the Somme, this action resulted in one of the greatest losses of life in modern history—over three-hundred thousand dead for a net gain of about seven miles of land.
1978—Jonestown Cult Commits Mass Suicide
In the South American country of Guyana, Jim Jones leads his Peoples Temple cult in a mass suicide that claims 918 lives, including over 270 children. Congressman Leo J. Ryan, who had been visiting the makeshift cult complex known as Jonestown to investigate claims of abuse, is shot by members of the Peoples Temple as he tries to escape from a nearby airfield with several cult members who asked for his protection.
November 17
1973—Nixon Proclaims His Innocence
While in Orlando, Florida, U.S. President Richard Nixon tells four-hundred Associated Press managing editors, "I am not a crook." The false statement comes to symbolize Nixon's presidency when facts are uncovered that prove he is, indeed, a crook.
November 16
1938—Lysergic Acid Diethylamide Created
In Basel, Switzerland, at the Sandoz Laboratories, chemist Albert Hofmann creates the psychedelic compound Lysergic acid diethylamide, aka LSD, from a grain fungus.
1945—German Scientists Secretly Brought to U.S.
In a secret program codenamed Operation Paperclip, the United States Army admits 88 German scientists and engineers into the U.S. to help with the development of rocket technology. President Harry Truman ordered that Paperclip exclude members of the Nazi party, but in practice many Nazis who had been officially classified as dangerous were also brought to the U.S. after their backgrounds were whitewashed by Army officials.
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