|Vintage Pulp||Nov 20 2009|
Allow yourself to be tortured to get laid? What sort of idiot would do that? Not you, right? No, but you did sit through all those episodes of Sex and the City. Remember that? And let's not forget all the times you ordered vegetarian at dinner. It’s coming back to you now, isn’t it? Hurts, right? Think you can take more? Ha ha. Remember that time you stayed the weekend at a B&B? I’m sorry, was that a scream we heard? No? Of course it wasn’t. You’re way too tough for that. Say, remember that time you took a salsa class? Oh, the pain. And remember that time you missed the Superbowl telecast because she wanted to go wine tasting? And let’s not forget that trip to Vegas with your buddies you missed because she got tickets to go to an art exhibit that weekend. Yes, we know. Just let it go. Let the tears flow. There there. There there. What was that? We're sorry, we couldn’t quite understand what you said through all your blubbering. You said you’d rather be chained and whipped instead? It’s too late my friend—you made your choice.